I use four letter words sometimes. I drink beer every so often. I even lust after beautiful women sometimes.
There are times I hate people, especially groups of people all following one creed. I also fantasize about what it would be like to kick someone's ass. No one in particular, anyone will do. I don't diet, dress to impress, and I like to say to myself that I don't care what you think of me.
All of these things are parts of me. Yes, even the raging, aggressive male hormones. It has been, and still is, the hardest thing for me to accept these things about myself. I would rather ignore the bad, or get rid of it altogether, and just take the good parts of me.
But I can't get rid of the bad. Believe me, I have tried. They are as much a part of me as my bald head is.
Learning to accept myself and all that comes with me has only been possible by looking in the mirror (figuratively), by reflecting and acknowledging that yes, I lust, and yes, I manage the image I try to present to others, including you all.
I think there is a freedom in being honest about these things. Two years ago, I wouldn't have been able to write this post. I would have written something else, but nothing like admitting that there are parts to me that aren't exactly things to be proud of.
And so I am not proud of them, even though I admit they are a part of me. Jesus accepts me as I am. It's time I learned to do the same.