12/23/2004

CHRISTMAS, OR CHRISTMAS DAY?

I haven’t enjoyed Christmas day in five years. That was the last time my ex-wife, my daughter, and I celebrated Christmas together as a family. Having read so many blogs recently regarding this phenomenon we call Christmas day, I thought I’d offer my view on what “Christmas day” is for me, and for my daughter, due to the divorce, the death of a family. If you are thinking of leaving your wife, or your husband, read this, and see if you still feel the same way. If you are thinking about getting married one day, don’t, unless you are willing to die to keep your marriage alive.

My Perspective: Every other year, I have my daughter for Christmas day.
My Daughter’s perspective: Every year, I miss either my mom, or my dad on Christmas day.
My perspective: Every other year, I wake up on Christmas day, wishing my daughter was here.
My Daughter’s perspective: Every day of every year, I wake up wishing my mom, or my dad was here.
My perspective: Every other year, I make the long drive to my parents house alone, and answer the same questions about why this year, my daughter is with her mom.
My daughter’s perspective: Every year, I take a long ride with either my dad, or my mom, and no one ever asks me why my dad or my mom isn’t there with me.
My perspective: Every year, I wish I could always have my daughter with me.
My daughter’s perspective: Every year, I wish I could have both of my parents with me always
My perspective: I am torn
My daughter’s perspective: I am torn
My perspective: Christmas day is just a day, and I can celebrate the birth of Christ every day
My daughter’s perspective: Christmas day is just like every other day, because I won’t get to see at least one of my parents.
My perspective: Christmas is peace in my heart, peace with God, every single day, especially when I miss my daughter.
My daughter’s perspective: Christmas just isn’t the same anymore, but I do love giving and receiving gifts.
My perspective: Christmas isn’t about friends and family, it’s about Jesus.
My daughter’s perspective: Christmas is when I see some of my cousins, but not all of them.
My perspective: Christmas day reminds me as much of what was lost, as it does of what has been gained. Some day, what was lost won’t matter.
My daughter’s perspective: Christmas is fun, but I don’t think people celebrate it right.
My perspective: Peace on earth, and good will toward men, and yea, be this a day to day thing, or be it not at all.
My daughter’s perspective: Why do people treat other people so badly, Daddy?

My final perspective about Christmas day: I no longer have to wait until December twenty-fifth to celebrate Christmas. I used to wait, because that was the Christian thing to do. But if there is Christ in me, then there lies the peace offering to the world, through one man, Jesus Christ. And no matter how rotten I am, how sinful, or how absolutely depraved I am, still, I know my Savior lives. And if He lives, then Christmas is every day for me, for my Savior will come for me, and show me peace, and rest from all sides. He will guide me into all truth, sanctify me, and then help me share what He has so graciously poured into me to overflowing.

If you ask me what I think about Christmas day, I will tell you plainly that Christmas day sucks. But if you ask me what I think about Christmas, about celebrating Jesus, then I will tell you that although I don’t always FEEL good about my walk, I always KNOW where to find peace. Christmas day is coming, and I do not look forward to all of the questions, and to the fact that my family PITIES me because my wife left me for another man so long ago. I don’t need or want pity. Sadly for them, they do not realize that because I know Jesus, and because they refuse to know Him, they are those who are to be pitied, despite outward appearances that they have it all together.

I love my family, and I will love them with the love of heaven. I don’t need it to be Christmas day to love them so, and to share with them the peace I know every day.

I wish and pray for all of you, that this Christmas day would not suck, that it would be filled with peace, and that you all would carry that peace with you, wherever you go, from now until THAT day.

No comments: