Tonight, Jesus, I thank you, for far more than I can say. I thank you in advance of the truth you will share with me. I thank you because all of this time, you have set me on a path that leads straight to the place of truth, straight to Your heart. And if I should have seen this truth a thousand times before, still I will not regret having missed it, for I know now Your will is done.
I do not know what circumstances lie ahead. And in my weakness, I will at times be anxious. But ever before me is Your peace, that which I do not deserve, and certainly did not earn. How many times, Lord, has the simplicity of Your peace kept me safe? How many times have I called to You, and You answered me, showering me with peace that I had no worldly reason to have?
You alone know of the nights of despair, of the rivers of tears, or the desire for an end. You alone know how long ago You saved me from that, and how softly You spoke to me when You did. You kept me from harm when I sought it for myself. And now all I seek is to know You.
Truth I will ever seek. I want to know everything, Lord, that you are willing to reveal. I am no longer pacified with knowing what I know. I want to know what You know, because what You know is only truth, while what I know may not be.
I admit this, Lord! I am not proud of what I know, except for You. If I were to stand before You tonight, still, I would admit that I am weak, and unknowing. You know it, You know it.
In me You have begun the work You will complete. In me, you have already changed my heart from one of arrogance, to one that is not so arrogant. I cannot boast in humility, because the truth is, I don’t really know what humility is. I wish I did.
But I do know this, You are the One Whom I want to know, You are the Truth I want to know. If I know nothing else but You, then I will know everything that is needed. You came after me with a jealous love, Lord, and I remember it well. I will never, ever forget how You chased me. And the times You gave me reason to believe, well, those were times I didn’t deserve the reason, and I know it. You didn’t have to, but You did.
And somehow, on my heart lie those words tonight, words to fall to sleep by, “You didn’t have to….but You did”