11/02/2004

DESIRES

I have a problem. I am struggling with my desire to write. This is strange for me, since I have never struggled with this in the past. It is all I can do just to post this little bit tonight.

Am I writing too much? Am I not thinking enough? Is there some other reason why the desire to write has suddenly left me?

Maybe you haven’t noticed, but my posts over the last few days have not been what I would call stellar, and quite frankly, if I don’t have the desire to write, then why bother writing garbage?

Work is busy, my time is less and less, and I find that by the time I get home at night, I just have no desire, no energy to do it. Have any of you out there experienced this? Is it just a thing I am going through? Or is this something that is a change within me, a lasting change? Admittedly, it has only been a week or so since I have felt this way. Right now, however, it just isn’t enjoyable. It’s more like work than it has ever been.

What does that mean? It means I may not be blogging as much. So for you forty or so people who read this blog daily, thanks for checking in, but the pickings may be scarce, at least for a short while. As I said, I will not write just for the sake of writing, and I will not post just for the sake of posting.

I will write when I have some news to share, or something to say. Maybe that’s it. Maybe I just don’t have much to say right now. If that is the case, then silence seems like the best choice to make. I hope you all will be patient, but if not, there are many blogs out there, and many are better than mine, I am sure.

Please don’t pity me. I’m not crushed over this, at all. I’m just being honest. It’s a happening in my life, as many other happenings in my life occur daily. This is just one of those.

Take care all. I may see you tomorrow…then again, I may not.

2 comments:

Monica said...

It's all good Tom.. take the quiet time and enjoy, post what you feel you want to, and don't feel bad when you don't have the words to express the inner workings of your heart. I think there are seasons and micro seasons that we move through and in, which sometimes result in an almost "pause" in desires. I feel this regularly, in many areas of my life. Talking with friends, correspondance, and even in my talks with God. It's like sometimes I'm getting caught up on a lot of stuff that has been going on, or like God is quietly preparing me for the transition or shift into a new season, where my current reflection plays a role of making sense of events.

see you when I see you :)

Tom Reindl said...

Monica; thanks. You know, I wonder if I put too much pressure on myself to "perform". Sort of like, "hey, I'm over here! Look at me!" I don't want to blog just to be read, or just to write.

MC, so that's why you put up quizzes on your blog! :) It's hard to compare me to you, though. You are a lot better at all this than I am. Thanks for the encouragement. :)