O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you understand my thought from afar. You scrutinize my path and my lying down, and are intimately acquainted with all my ways. Even before there is a word on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it all. You have enclosed me behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me, such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is too high, I cannot attain to it.
From a Psalm
Ever wonder what your day would be like if there was an electronic sign posted on your forehead, said sign displaying all of your thoughts as they scrolled across your mind?
I don’t know how it is for you, but my thoughts show me to be less than I hope to be, and less than one day I will be. If you could read my thoughts on a continuous stream, like the Wall street ticker, you’d run very fast, and very far away from me.
I thank God that you cannot read my thoughts, but I thank God that He can!
For if He could not read my thoughts, honesty with Him, even partial honesty, would be impossible for me. As it is today, I am able to, in a large extent, share with my Father my honest thoughts, feelings, hopes, and disappointments.
Psalm 139 (partial above) can for many be a scary Psalm. It was once for me also. But I find that abandonment from my will into His leads me to find peace and security in knowing Father can do ALL THESE THINGS. Yes, even reading my thoughts as if they were scrolling across a sign pasted on my forehead.
You see, Father KNOWS me. I mean, REALLY KNOWS me. I am not a surprise to Him, my thoughts are not ever going to cause Him to say, “I didn’t know that!” So no matter how wretched or good my thoughts are, my Father will keep His eyes on me, and lay His hand upon me, He will hold me to my benefit, keeping me safe in wonder at how He does that.
God’s word could be scary. The thought that He already knows my thoughts, even my words before they form on my lips, well…that could cause me to tremble. Instead, there is only now security, and peace, in knowing He knows me, all these things about me.
I find that no matter where I am, be in the physical sense, or the Spiritual sense, that God is not surprised, and that He loves me, and is TAKING CARE OF ME. Yes, I, too, am just a scared little boy, as my pastor recently admitted to me that he was. And we can know peace and joy, knowing we have a Father who is taking care of us. How could it be otherwise? If He sees our thoughts, and still loves us, if He knows what silly and wretched things scroll across our minds and still He withholds death from us, how could that be anything but love?
Freedom resides in the heart that is loved, and KNOWS it. Get to know God’s love, before you do anything else. Because without love, Heaven is worthless.