9/08/2005

FOR THE TWO WHO MAKE NEW ORLEANS ALIVE TO ME

My heart hurts.

I have been reading the blogs of the Fish and Crystal for some time now, long before that bitch Katrina hit.

My heart hurts to read the pain, and the displacement of their lives because of this storm. Let’s face it, that’s all Katrina really was…a storm.

They are so far from their city right now, so far from their house, but I want them to know, they are right at home, right now.

To read about their children, which is easy, because they write about these young ones often, is to read about a FAMILY. A REAL family. I feel like they are my next door neighbors sometimes. And my heart hurts for them.

New Orleans is just a city, but wherever the Fish and Crys are, they are the city of New Orleans. You see…a city isn’t place, it’s a people, all molded into one giant conglomerate of persons living together.

PERSONS LIVING TOGETHER!!!!

We are family, and we are city.

Fish and Crys, in Iowa you may be, but in my heart, you are right here. If there was one thing I could give you guys right now, it would be the biggest group hug the world has ever seen, in the midst of a gentle rain, you Fish, and you Crystal, and your small ones, with me surrounding you all, and whispering, “everything is going to be alright…I promise.”

All of your uncertainty,. I pray God give to me. All of your pain , I pray God place upon me. I cannot bear to know that you feel anything but joy. My heart hurts, and it is you Fish, and you, Crystal, who touch me so. I want to take all of your feelings of removal, displacement, shock, helplessness, bottledupedness, and receive it into myself, so that you don’t have to feel this.

The Fish and Crystal ARE home. Despite the distance from their house, they are home. I ask you all to pray for them, that they would feel at home. I know that being so far away is distance of the body. I want their hearts to feel so close…as if they are ONE…RIGHT NOW. I want you Fish, and you Crystal, to feel so in love, with each other and with your small ones, that this physical distance becomes an afterthought.

May God make His brilliant face to shine upon you, may He fill your hearts with ONE, with FAMILY, with each other, may He shine upon you brighter than the sun, stronger than Katrina, in the midst of the real storm, the one that Katrina left behind for everyone.

Fish and Crystal, I don’t deserve your fellowship. I am a selfish man. I wish I wasn’t so. And as difficult as this is to say because of what happened…I am glad you are New Orleans…otherwise, I would have remained far removed from feeling the pain of the victims of a bitch like Katrina. I am not glad for your loss. I am just thankful that God has used you guys to help me FEEL.

Believe me when I say, feeling is not an easy thing for me to do.

Though I have never met you, I miss you. I don’t know how or why I feel that…I just do. I leave you with my peace, and all these wonderful people praying for you. It’s all I have to give, dear ones. Be dear to me forever, as I know you will be, thank you for gracing the pages of this weblog.

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