11/30/2005

PASSING INTO A CELEBRATION OF LIFE

I’d like to do something different today. I’d like to ask your view about a statement I am about to make.

Last night, I was talking with my best friend Brett, and touched on some pretty interesting things. One of the things we talked about was the seemingly backwards approach we take towards our “behavior”, or shall I say, towards changing our behavior.

As we were talking, I was searching my mind for a memory of Jesus preaching out a list of things not to do…you know, such as “Don’t drink, don’t smoke, and don’t gamble.” I tried as best I could, but was not able to recall even a single instance where the thrust of Jesus’ preaching was a list of things we can’t do as His followers. Strangely, I started coming up with a list of things inside of my mind that He said we could do as Brett and I talked.

Our conversation hinged on the idea that if we are going to focus on our efforts at changing our behavior, we are going to fail, because we’ve always failed. We asked whether having Jesus inside of us would make any difference towards those efforts, and I think we agreed that the difference was the approach rather than the effort and or success.

The approach (and thus, the statement) is this:

We have passed from fear of death into the celebration of life.

In our fear, we could try as we might to change our behavior, with little or no lasting success. Even if we did modify our behavior, it did nothing toward our reconciliation with our Abba. Jesus handled that by himself, and since that time, if our focus is on modifying our behavior because we feel guilty about something, then our focus is on death.

So what would a focus on the celebration of life look like? Do you think having that new focus might change things in your life? These are the things I care about, and that is why I am asking for your opinion on this.

Remember, we have passed from fear of death INTO the celebration of life.

11/28/2005

AFTER YOU, MY HEART

I feel like flying right now. My heart is leaping, my spirit is soaring…if only my body could go where my spirit and heart goes.

Is this the disconnect I feel sometimes? That my body does not go where my heart goes? Is it that detachment I feel when my limbs cannot reach as high as my spirit can? What an amazing and wonderful experience this is, yet it is simultaneously maddening and exasperating.

As I head towards my goal, what will be the ways my spirit will teach my body to follow? How long will it take?

I am so filled with emotion right now, that words elude me, and if you know anything about me, you know words rarely do that to me. But at this moment, I am actually typing at a snail’s pace, attempting to find words which will describe how I feel, and what it means.

I have been sitting tonight watching television, yet not really watching television, as I so often do. One of the things I do best when the tube is on is think. The themes, stories, or images cause my mind to go into overdrive, and if I’m not carefully watching, the television screen becomes a blankness to my mind, and my thoughts begin to tell a story of their own. Such has been happening tonight. For some reason, my thoughts have linked up with my heart, and my heart is soaring in places my body cannot yet follow.

I feel as though I am into the clouds on this starless night, searching for a break of open space, looking for a star anywhere, but not really caring if I find one. The flight is enough for me. Someday, my body will follow my heart; in fact, I think there are times it already does.

Is this joy? Is it happiness? I don’t know if I can give it a name, because it doesn’t hinge on any circumstance.

CONFIDENCE!

Is that it?...

Sort of. And peace. And joy. And hope. And anticipation. And , and, and.

You get the idea.

I feel like a child tonight…yes, that’s it! A child!

What a wonderful feeling. Is this what heaven feels like?

11/26/2005

KINDNESS IS JESUS

Kindness.

If I had to sum up the life of Christ in one word, and not use the word “love”, it would be kindness. Of all the things Jesus did and said, His kindness stands out to me most, even above His miracles, which are awesome and at times fearful. Even above His death and resurrection, stands His kindness.

That’s saying quite a bit, isn’t it?

Even above His resurrection?

Yes. But not only above His death and resurrection, also IN it.

Jesus said somewhere that we should follow Him. I’ve never really thought about what He meant, but I wonder lately….was kindness on His mind when He said it?

I have seen some incredible acts of kindness in my life, from all sorts of wonderful people. I have seen the arms of Christ envelop me, and people around me, through the bodies of people He inhabits. I have seen even people who don’t believe give incredibly of themselves without being asked. In every instance, the reaction to these kindnesses has been surprise, wonder, tears of joy, smiles, laughter, and hugs. I have never, not even once, witnessed an argument, fight, or war start over a kindness done. I wonder…is that a lesson we can learn from?

If it seems as though kindness can wipe out envy, hate, and strife, does it also seem like we would be better served by being kind always?

If we are going to follow Christ, I am of the opinion that the best way we can do so is to be kind, to everyone. Be kind to them in person, and in thought. And there, in thought, is where it gets difficult.

Being kind, at first, will be a discipline. Don’t let the times deceive you. There are still some things you have to work at in order to be successful. In our day, we are rapidly moving toward an almost effortless society. We want what we want, and we want it now. Furthermore, it should be GIVEN to us, not earned. This is the creed of many in our day in history. Don’t let it be yours. If it is, you’ll never be kind to your neighbor.

How do I know this? Because you can’t be kind just knowing you are forgiven. You can’t be kind just knowing you are loved. Something inside of us prevents us from being naturally kind to everyone, regardless of circumstance or past. You can’t be kind by merely wanting to be kind. YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE IT, internally first, and then externally as the result of what is going on inside.

You see, what pours out from us MUST match what lives inside of us, otherwise, our kind deeds are nothing more than hypocrisy lived out. Naturally, if we feed evil within us, kindness will rarely flow from us. Do you see why the two MUST match? Many in this world would tell you that this simply isn’t true, that kindness flows even from people who feed the evil within. I would answer, “Kindness for kindness’ sake never flows from a heart which feeds itself evil. Evil has a personal agenda, kindness does not. The two are at opposite poles of one another, and NEVER meet in the middle.” You can bet on it, if evil is fed, the “kindness” you see flowing from it is nothing more than a ruse to gain its desires and lusts.

Kindness will change your family. Kindness will change your children, your spouse, your friends and your job. Kindness will change the world, and it can be changed. But best of all, kindness will change us. There is only one way to be kind; you can only be kind by putting someone else above you. There is no other way to do it. The monstrous Me, me, me must die inside before kindness will live within. It isn’t easy, don’t be fooled. At first, it will be difficult, but the more you begin to see the love of Christ within you, and the more you seek His love within you, the more you will begin to be predisposed towards kindness. Killing the me, me, me is difficult, but because of Christ, you can see a resurrection of the new you just beyond the blackness inside.

Now think about the words “Follow me” that Jesus once said. Do they mean something different today?

11/24/2005

ON THE LEVELING AWAY, A THANKSGIVING PLEA

Happy Thanksgiving.

I’d like to share the lyrics to one of my favorite songs with you. I think these words have more to do with Thanksgiving than a Noontime football game, turkey, and pumpkin pie, followed by a one hour siesta.

Let no one say that so-called “secular” bands, especially rock bands, cannot come up with lyrics that mean something…even a great deal of something. I was twenty years old when I first heard the words to Pink Floyd’s “On The Turning Away”, and at that time, I was too caught up in myself to bother thinking about what the words were saying to us.

I think these lyrics say this;

He who gives to the poor will never want, but he who shuts his eyes will have many curses. Proverbs 28:27

If you like, you can open your bible and read the entire “chapter”, although I recommend reading the entire book of proverbs, or you may miss the deeper meaning of the book, and each individual proverb.

"On The Turning Away"

On the turning away
From the pale and downtrodden
And the words they say
Which we won't understand
"Don't accept that what's happening
Is just a case of others' suffering
Or you'll find that you're joining in
The turning away"
It's a sin that somehow
Light is changing to shadow
And casting it's shroud
Over all we have known
Unaware how the ranks have grown
Driven on by a heart of stone
We could find that we're all alone
In the dream of the proud
On the wings of the night
As the daytime is stirring
Where the speechless unite
In a silent accord
Using words you will find are strange
And mesmerized as they light the flame
Feel the new wind of change
On the wings of the night
No more turning away
From the weak and the weary
No more turning away
From the coldness inside
Just a world that we all must share
It's not enough just to stand and stare
Is it only a dream that there'll be
No more turning away?

Pink Floyd

Today is thanksgiving, and I am seeing more and more each day to be thankful for. Not just the usual stuff, like family and friends, home and food, peace and freedom. Those things are important. But are they any more important than the loud quietness of the deep woods, a single cloud on a sunny day, or the challenge of a problem that seems unsolvable? God has made this world infinitely exciting, challenging, beautiful, and fun. It’s full of colors, emotions, and experiences waiting to be met. Friends, family, and food are wonderful, but so are the mundane things, the little things, the simple things.

Sometimes I think we in America are spoiled beyond repair. Then, I listen to the words of a song like “On The Turning Away”, and I have hope that one person, one more person, and then another will hear these same lyrics, and be affected to the very core of his being. I have hope that there will be no more turning away, from the pale and downtrodden, from the poor and the needy, all those who are most certainly no less important than the President of the United States, or Donald Trump, and others whom we seem to give almost all of our attention to.

And there it is. If you want to thank your maker, your Father in heaven, then give to the poor, the pale, the downtrodden. Don’t just send a check. Any fool can do that. Give them more…give them attention; balance the amount of attention you give to the “important” people and things with the amount of attention you give to those deemed “less” by the “upper echelon” of this world. For there is no upper echelon, all have fallen short of the glory of God. One day, every eye will see that regardless of status or possession, every single one of us is no higher nor lower than the next.

I guess I’ll call this post “On the Leveling away”, because in the end, we are all on the same level, every one of us. You will meet people who think that by their great effort, they have made themselves better than others. But I go back to the beginning, and in the beginning, there was only God. With a start like that, you tend you know who to thank for all that you have. Without that Beginning, you’d have nothing, be nothing, and know nothing.

Remember the poor and the widows.

11/16/2005

A CHANCE TO REFLECT

My deer hunting experience will begin in two days. For more reasons than just the urge to slay a buck the size of a small elk, I am looking forward to this.

As the day for me to head to the north woods of Wisconsin draws ever nearer, I find myself anxious to be there already. I know what will happen, but I do not know what will result from it.

I will spend three to four days in the woods, being as silent as I can, hardly moving, hoping the scouting I did pays off. But more importantly, I will be forced to reflect.

It doesn't matter what I reflect on, the simplest truth in this matter is that I wll reflect on something, and that, for me, is necessary. I have no choice really, if I sit in that chair in my hunting stand high in the air, being silent, my mind will be forced to remember, to think, and to process things. Some of these things might be of the sort I wished I didn't have to process (like Theresa Holbach's murder), but others, such as merely thinking about God and my relationship with Him will be welcome experiences. If you have ever sat in silence for three or four days straight, you quickly realize that your mind is anything but silent, and thus, you begin to reflect.

I am looking forward to this time of reflection. I know my mind will dwell on some things it maybe shouldn't, but that doesn't frighten me. You see, I never feel closer to God than when my mouth is silent, and my mind is loud. In my mind, God is here, as I know He is in my heart as well. Somehow, when I am speaking outloud, or entertained by the many things we can be entertained with, God seems to drift into the background. I have found that although silence can be unnerving at times, if I long for God, there is no better way to find Him again than to be silent. That is true for me...I do not know what is true for you.

But I hope everyone has their moments of silence. Sometimes we can fear the silence, but my experience with it is that I always come away from silence with a renewed sense of peace. I look forward to those moments the older I get. Peace be with you as well.

11/12/2005

THERESA HALBACH IS A PERSON, NOT A STORY

I suppose I have to process this. It is the news that a young lady was brutally raped and murdered not fifteen miles from my house. The lady's name is Theresa Halbach, and this case has rapidly become national news.

It has not become national news because the deed committed against her was so heinous and rare. On the contrary, this type of crime occurs every single day in our nation. It has not become national news because the news media cares so deeply about Theresa and her family. I wish that were the case. Rather, it has become national news because of the connection between her alleged attacker, Steven Avery, and his past.

Steven Avery was released from prison a short while ago after serving eighteen years for a rape he did not commit. He has a case pending against Manitowoc county for millions of dollars because of the wrongful imprisonment. The question has already been asked; Why does a man with a very winnable case suddenly commit this crime? Many around here believe he didn't, despite the evidence against him. I do not know how much he is suing for, but the most common amount I have heard repeatedly is 36 million dollars. The most common opinion is that he deserved it, and would get it. You would think such a man would have absolutely no reason to commit any crime of any type.

So the focus of this case has been on the alleged attacker, and not on the disappearance of a girl named Theresa. That disappearance has now turned into a rape/murder case, and we will never get to see Theresa alive this side of heaven again. The local and national media have all focused on the connection between Steven Avery and His past; it is the stuff of TV movies, and they are doing their best to keep interest in this aspect of the case alive. We are left asking why?

Yesterday, on my way to Manitowoc (a city which is barely a few miles south of my home, Two Rivers) I drove as if in a haze. My thoughts centered on Theresa Halbach, and what she must have felt during the last hours of her life. Despite the terror of being raped and abused, would she not have in the end, still hoped to escape alive? Wouldn't she have desparately wanted to cling to life, hoping beyond hope to see her family again? If only she could just live, she could process this attack, she could survive it, and move on with her life. But that opportunityy was taken away from her. In the end, she was left without a choice; she was killed because she was no longer of any worth to the man who attacked her. Instead, she became a liability to him, and he couldn't afford to let her live to tell her tale.

I do not know if Steven Avery is guilty. The crime scene, if that is where she was actually killed, is only fifteen miles from my house. The highway leading to the scene has been closed off for a week, and no one can drive straight through any more. Our small town existence has been intruded upon by hundreds of police officers and of course, the media. The ever-loving media. They are allowed to be in the vicinity of the crime, spinning their stories despite fact, trying to make the loudest noise so everyone will listen to them.

But the loudest voice I hear today is Theresa's, crying out for Daddy in her last moments of life. If not out loud, certainly in her heart. I hear her screaming pleas of mercy to ears that have become deaf to absolute anguish. I hear her fear, her whole body will not stop shaking, and every time her attacker approaches, her breath shortens, and eyes widen as her soul screams out to God for help! There is no one coming to help her, there isn't even a physical body who will come to her and hold her tightly, letting her know after all that she will be alright. She will never again, from those last moments onward, be comforted in this life by another human being. She will only know terror, torture, and in the end, an utter lack of mercy. Mercy was beyond hope.

The real story, not the garbage you will see on television or read in the papers, is that young Theresa cried out to someone, anyone, for mercy and aid. No one answered, "yes". The only answer she received was the cold look of death in her attackers eyes. The only story worth telling now is for us to face this pain she felt, to process it, KNOW it, think about it, all of us, so that it never happens again.

It will, of course, happen over and over every day in this nation. Can you imagine the pain and fear? Can you imagine your soul tearing in pieces? Can you imagine yourself being Theresa? Can you get there? The people we will meet for the rest of our lives need us to get there. They need us to feel what Theresa felt, at least even a small part, so that we will not wish or carry out that kind of crime upon anyone else. So that we will not harm our neighbor but will instead see a person just like Theresa, someone who is worth dying for, so that she will not have to die in our stead.

Why do we ask "Why?" We know why. We know because Theresa is just a story for the media to tell. And Steven Avery, if he is actually guilty, is just an interesting TV movie waiting to be shown. That is what we normally reduce these "stories" and the people in them to.

But I can't hear the media's story above the screams in my head from a girl named Theresa Halbach.

11/09/2005

BREAKING THROUGH THE VICTIM

I am tearing down ancient barriers that I built a long time ago. They have been in existence for as long as I can remember. Over the last five years, I built them even higher, and then believed I couldn't overcome them, these obstacles of my own doing.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be the very best you could possibly be? Have you ever wondered what it would be like to actually succeed completly, without a hint of failure? What would it take? Would it take great effort?

I have news for you. The only thing it will take is faith. I am a walking poster child for the "almost...but not quite" gang. All of my life, I have almost completely succeeded...but not quite. There has always been something holding me back, some little thing I did wrong, or chose badly, or reacted to that kept me from fully achieving my goals. I reached my goals in part, but would end up broken, beaten, and tired from the exertion.

The worst thing is, everything that caused me to fail was me. Due either to a lack of effort, a glaring error, or a miscue that somehow kept me from reaching the highest height, I always found myself "wishing" I could have finally reached the top of the mountain. It all stems from a lack of faith (or maybe a better way to put it would be a fear of complete success).

I do not know what has happened recently to change my mind. But I do know that even as I knew I was safe with God, I was afraid of fully succeeding. I was afraid of doing what I knew I could do to be my best at everything, to excel. I know...it doesn't seem to make sense, does it? How can someone be afraid to be the best they can be? How can someone stop just short of their goal all because of fear? Isn't that silly?

I sense that fear right now, lurking beneath the surface like a shark circling his prey, waiting for the chance to strike and destroy and devour. That is what fear does to us. But fear isn't an outsider, he is an insider. He isn't a curcumstance, he is our reluctance to live fully. I am certain there are things I still fear, things I have not done that I don't even know about because some fear holds me at bay. But a little more each day, I begin to realize that I can fully live, there is nothing to fear. Succeeding, excelling, reaching for the flag at the peak is not something to be feared; it is something to be embraced.

For as long as I can recall, I have stopped short because to me, ultimate victory was unknown. I had victories and celebrations, but I always stopped short of my ultimate goal. Some might say my goals were too high, while others would say I sabotaged my own success.

I say, I will be a victim of fear no longer, because strange as it may seem, I was actually a victim of myself.

Go on, it doesn't take any more effort to be the best you can be. It only takes a little faith, and a simple realization that what stops us most often is ourselves.

11/06/2005

JUST A FEW GOOD THINGS

If I expect to be good at something, is it wrong when I react in disappointment, if I turn out to be not as good as I expected to be?

I’d like to hear your opinion about that, seriously.

I have been doing some thinking lately. This freedom we have seems to be useful for something, after all. As I was thinking the other day, I realized that there are definitely some things I am good at. Then, I realized there are some things I am very good at; you might almost say I excel in them.

So, what do I do with this knowledge? It is a dangerous knowledge, I think, yet a necessary one, to discover what we are good at. I consider these things to be gifts from God…I really do. Not everyone may agree with that, and that’s okay; I understand if you don’t.

Let’s say I am good at being a daddy. My daughter seems to think I am, and there are times where I am able to display levels of compassion and self-control that I see no where else in my life. Then, there are times when I feel like the worst father in the world. I could bury myself with guilt.

But I’ve come to realize that if I possess these skills, such as a skill in carpentry, I should do something with it. What can I do?

At the risk of sounding conceited, I will say right now that I think I should push myself to become perfect in these things.

Hold on there, I’m not talking about earning God’s pleasure here. I already have that. But I AM talking about taking the few things I know I am good at, and beginning to excel at them. If I do that, certain expectations are naturally going to arise. Is there danger in these expectations? Am I safe to strive at the things I am good at, reaching toward perfection? Or am I setting myself up for a major disappointment.

Before you answer the disappointment question, ask yourself this; what right do we have to expect that we will never be disappointed? And if we have this freedom now to strive without being judged, wouldn’t the greater disappointment lie in doing nothing? In always wondering how good we could have done?

What heights can we reach? Can we ever know if we never try?

I have been given a few things to be good at. I know I don’t HAVE to be good at them, my destiny doesn’t hinge on my performance. But now that the pressure’s off, just how good can I get at these things? I wonder if it makes a difference, this knowing that the pressure is off.

11/02/2005

EVOLUTION VERSES THE SECOND LAW OF THERMODYNAMICS

A few weeks ago, I said that I would revisit the topic of evolution, and today, I am doing so.

This was brought on by a post from a good blogging buddy of mine, the FISH. Read his article, because it comes to bear on what I am writing here.

So…did dinosaurs exist? I believe they did. However, I know they did not exist over one hundred million years ago. In fact, I know they didn’t exist any earlier than six thousand years ago.

How do I know this? Let’s study the evidence.

One of the basic rules in the theory of evolution is that matter is able to not only form itself from nothing, but transform itself using information that at the moment it is transformed, is not even in existence. In other words, evolution claims that species evolved by ADDING information into their genetic code through means of beneficial mutations. I find two problems immediately with this idea. The first is that we, human beings, as far back as we have studied mutations, have never, not even once, witnessed a naturally occurring beneficial mutation. Every naturally occurring mutation we have witnessed has been a mutation which has caused a degradation of information within the genetic code, i.e., information was lost, not gained.

The second reason why it is obvious to me is that DNA already contains every bit of information a cell needs to function according to its design. So far as I know, information can never, ever be added to DNA, information can only be lost. Thus, if the information for a bird to become a dog is not found within that bird’s DNA, that species’ DNA will never, ever gain the information necessary for it to transform into another species.

This little fact completely obeys the Second Law of Thermodynamics (Statistical thermodynamics), which states that the organized complexity of a structured system tends to become disorganized and random. The Informational Law of Thermodynamics states that information (example: the information found in DNA) conveyed by a communicating system (Example: DNA structure) tends to become distorted and incomplete.

A simpler way to put that would be, given millions and billions of years to operate and communicate, DNA would have devolved, not evolved, according to these laws of nature. That DNA over time loses information, and becomes prone to mutations over that time is a proven fact.

One more proof of the loss of information, or of mutations being harmful to a species or simple structure is what happens to viruses that mutate. As we know, viruses are not alive, they can only exist within a living cell; without that host cell, a virus breaks down into harmless and defeated information almost instantly. But even a virus within a living cell will mutate from its original form, and as it does, that virus will lose information, and eventually, destroy itself. This is another proven fact. Viruses are the single greatest piece of evidence I have seen to disprove evolution, because we know that viruses mutate rapidly, within one or two generations (exactly the rate of mutation that evolution requires). Yet viruses never, ever generate beneficial mutations; the mutations are always of a degrading nature, ending up in the absolute destruction of the virus. Given a living cell with which to mutate within, according to evolution, a virus should be able to become a living organism of its own accord, yet we never witness this with viruses. We only ever witness their destruction through degrading mutations.

If Dinosaurs were in existence millions of years ago, their extinction would have occurred rapidly, regardless of a natural catastrophe or not. It is no different with human beings Information is being lost, through mutations (such as cancer), and over time, humans will become extinct as well, our own DNA having mutated to the point where survival on this planet is no longer possible.

That may sound like a bunch of radical preaching to you, but if you know what the laws of nature are, especially the second law of thermodynamics, you would find it impossible for humans to exist forever in any form. The laws of Nature prohibit it, making it impossible for us to exist beyond even possibly a few more thousand years. The information contained within our DNA mutates, never beneficially, and when it does, information is lost. In such a body requiring such a delicate balance for survival, any loss of information is critical and could rapidly spell the end of the human race.

This isn’t doomsday preaching, this is simply scientific fact. If information is lost, it cannot be regained. We, the human race, in fact all of creation, require redemption. We cannot save ourselves, we cannot add the information that is being lost from generation to generation. And the more information which is lost, the more rapidly our DNA’s information will become disorganized, and mutate.

Could dinosaurs have existed several million years ago? No, because the basic building blocks of life, DNA, would not have survived the length of time required, and the information in that DNA could not have increased to form even more complex organisms (us) than dinosaurs. The second law of thermodynamics spells our doom, information cannot be added, not from one species to another, not to a single strand of DNA, and not to every strand of DNA in existence; information can only be lost.

Thus, for evolution to be true, that second law of thermodynamics cannot be true. And for a lengthy age of life to have existed on this earth, that second law cannot be true; information is never added over time, it is only lost. Dinosaurs and humans existed together, AS DIFFERENT, SEPARATE SPECIES, at the same time, and in some of the same places. According to the second law of thermodynamics, the more time given, the more disorganized and degraded a complex system will become, finally becoming an incomplete system, which no longer resembles, or functions like the original system did. This spells the doom of evolution, which relies solely upon billions of beneficial mutations, where information is added to a system or species to form a newer, more complex system or species.

The laws of nature forbid such an occurrence. Given time, apart from a higher power, everything will go to pieces. This is a fact, and it is the only conclusion that can be drawn from the laws of nature. Any other conclusion, such as evolution or the big bang theory, directly contradicts these laws.

Could God have caused “evolution” as His means of creation? I see no reason why He could not have…except to ask the question, “Why bother?” Could God have created the universe just as our book of Genesis says He did? Of course He could have. In fact, if God said, “Let there be light”, by the laws of nature, that light, if seen on earth, had to be mature, it had to travel the length of space to reach us, thus it had to be “old” upon it’s conception.

There are other examples of elements and chemicals that could only appear from the beginning in an advanced state, an “old” state. So the next time someone says, “The earth is 4.3 billion years old”, hear them out, and then remember that the second law of thermodynamics makes that age of the earth, and thus evolution an impossibility.